What’s the Big Deal About Mother’s Day?

What is it, exactly, about moms that generates all the love, flowers, cards and hugs that happen on Mother’s Day? It’s not just about a day on the calendar; it’s about the one holiday, aside from Christmas, that’s respected and honored for what it’s all about and nobody dares to debate it.

While everybody’s experiences are different, there’s little doubt that a mother or a mother figure is a primary influence in a person’s life, regardless of what that experience is. There are expectations of what a mother should be and then there’s reality.

The expectation is that a mother is perfect; she is exactly what we all need. She is fierce and protects us and she is soft and sweet and nurtures us. She knows what’s good for us and somehow makes everything better. She also makes the best chocolate chip cookies in the world.

The reality is that most of us moms spend our lives not knowing what we’re doing and praying for the best. We’re not trained in being a mother, there aren’t classes telling us what to do or how to do it. It’s something that each one of us must figure out for ourselves. I can say for certain that it’s the hardest job that I’ve ever had in my life and, yes, it IS a job. On top of any other job and the million responsibilities that we all have, we are responsible for a living, breathing, human life and ensuring that they are safe and happy for the next 18 years (forever).  It’s hard and there’s no break. It’s a 24-hour, 7-day a week job.

We fail sometimes. We’re not perfect but we try, and we keep trying. We might not get everything right; in fact, we might get a lot wrong, but the one thing we want you to know is that we tried to the best of our ability to be everything that you needed. A mother loves her child with every fiber of her being for the entirety of her life. This is what Mother’s Day is about!

Happy Mother’s Day to all of you celebrating today! Enjoy your day; you deserve it!

What Makes Our Mother So Special?

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First of all, it’s because she gave birth to us. She CHOSE to do that. She didn’t know what kind of kid you’d end up being. She didn’t know if you’d end up being a brain surgeon or end up in jail. It was all a crap shoot when she decided to have you, her baby. Just for this, you should thank her.

Secondly, she’s a hero for even HAVING you. Giving birth is not a picnic and you owe her big time for that. In fact, you can never even come close to repaying her for that, so at least make or get her a really nice Mother’s Day card.

It doesn’t matter how old you are; your mother is still likely an important influence in your life. No matter her current status, she still holds an important place in your life. Moms are there to be both loved and not-so-loved at different parts of your life and, because they’re your mom, they understand that.

I think we all like to believe that our mother is super-human. They can do anything! They know what’s best for us, they protect us from harm, they know what kind of cookies we like and they make them for us when we’re sad. When we’re sick, they know just what to do to help us feel better. When we succeed at something, they are the first person in line to celebrate our greatness! They help us figure out who we are, who we want to be, and how to get there. Moms are unconditional love.

At some point while we’re growing up, we’re going to learn differently. We’re going to recognize that our mom made a mistake or that we would do something differently than she had done. You might just be disappointed by that. It’s okay. It’s normal and part of our becoming our own person. It’s how we grow up and become independent with our own thoughts, values, and ways of doing things.

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Speaking as a daughter, I regret some of the things I said to my own mother. I regret the pain that I caused her when I was a teen and again later in life. I’m sure there were several times that we had differences of opinions but she NEVER stopped loving me or letting me know that she loved me. I, too, had differences of opinion where I didn’t necessarily agree with all of her choices, but I never stopped loving her either. That’s the thing; your mother is your mother. We need to remember that each one of us, both when we’re young and when we’re old, are simply doing the best that we can in the moment with what we have. If we stop to think about it, we can all understand that.

Speaking as a mother myself, I can tell you that it’s terrifying! The fact that you’re instantly responsible for an entire human life with absolutely no qualifications is crazy. Our kids think we’re perfect when they’re small and we sure don’t want to disappoint them, but we’re just normal people. I can certainly assure you that I am a flawed human being. I’ve made mistakes in my life and as a parent. I definitely have things that I wish I would have done differently; some big and some small. I feel each and every one of those. I have no more important thing in my life than my children and I would do anything to spare them hurt. The worst part of being a mother is the knowledge that sometimes you can’t fix it for them. Some things aren’t fixable and others shouldn’t be. Part of being a mother is stepping back and supporting them while they manage their own situations.

As we move through life in our role of the child or the mother, we change. Relationships will change over time with each child and we need to adapt. What doesn’t change? Our mom is still our mom. Treasure this relationship; there’s not another one like it.

Wishing you each a very Happy Mother’s Day!

To My Mom, for whom I would do anything in the world to be able to talk with again

To My Kids, who ARE my whole world

I Love You

Happy Mother’s Day!

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In honor of Mother’s Day today, let’s take a minute to think about exactly what it takes to be a mom.   You would think it’s easy; have a child, right?  It could be, but there are so many other ways that you can be a mom.  There are step-moms, aunts, sisters, team moms, and the neighbors who help take care of you when you need it.  There are so many different ways to be a mom that there is no definition and we should celebrate all the women that have such a huge impact in our children’s lives.

I believe that being a mother is the most difficult job in the world.  You need to be all things to all of your kids at all times.  That means when one is happy and one is sad, you have to be happy and sad at the same time.  When one of your children is in pain, your whole being is in pain.  Each one will be going through something different and you have to adjust to each circumstance. Continue reading “Happy Mother’s Day!”

What IS Comfort Food, Anyway?

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comfort food

Who doesn’t love comfort food?  Comfort food is simply the food (or foods) that make you feel better when you think about them; it comforts you.  They are particularly handy to make when you’re stressed, sad, or anxious because it makes you feel better.  If you’re happy, they make you even happier!  It makes me nostalgic.

I said something about comfort food one day when my kids were younger and they didn’t believe there was such a thing.  They insisted that I made it up.  I had to prove that the phrase “comfort food” was a real thing and that other people knew about it too.  They’re convinced that we make things up to tell them; I’m not sure why.  It’s something to do with me telling them about the eyes in the back of my head when they were little. Continue reading “What IS Comfort Food, Anyway?”

It’s National Puppy Day!

Our furry friends provide unconditional love.  They are there for us when we’re happy, when we’re sad, and are faithful like no other.  Today is our day to honor our bff.  Maybe an extra treat today (’cause you know, it’s different than every other day we spoil them).

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National Puppy Day